ejaculate, and disperse

The deserving bastard. Always had a way of riling her up.

Confusion. As sweet as it can be, it's the bad kind of ecstasy. Everything's sentimental, blame the chemicals.

I like things that swing.

I haven't the slightest idea what's different this time. I am not sure whether gaining control is what I should focus on. If it makes you happy, it can't be that bad? But if makes you happy only for a while, how do you find the strength to savour it than to mull over the fact that it's going to end someday? I'm not going insane.

Comfort. He wants to feel like a child again.

Play well, and play hard, child. Age compromises nothing for fun.

It's sickening and heartwrenching to come to a point where you wish that you want nothing to do with the current version of yourself.

Monsters and the bogeyman don't exist, but in real life, you'll meet conmen, thieves, and those who find pleasure in betraying friendships and trust. Hopefully, strength will be with you.

Don't waver. Sleepless nights do nothing for your complexion and your mind. Think hard before getting involved with men you don't trust at first sight. Think harder before getting involved with men you find irresistible at first sight.

Have faith. That's what people think I need, but it's been long since the time I knew that was what I want.

Don't waver.

It’s a weird thing, what we call friendship. Pardon me for being blunt but I don’t think it has ever revolved around clichéd idioms about unsinkable ships and cheesy “Friends Forever” slogans. In the past, I have been naive enough to believe that you can have the same friends for a lifetime. I’m not saying that friends should be recycled and certainly they should not be reused, but it’s amazing what you can learn from strangers who become your buddies in such a short time.

You learn that there are superficial sides to every single person in this world. Although they vary in intensity but they always exist. You learn that honesty sometimes requires a bit of sugar-coating, although your modus operandi has always been straight-to-the-point-no-nonsense-brutal-candour. You learn that there are times when you just have to tell it as it is and bear the consequences in the form of cat-calls and malicious glances, so that people know that not just about everything goes. You learn that you might not like a friend the way you liked him yesterday or the day before, simply because you discovered a facet you’ve never expected to find. You learn that sometimes you will inevitably sigh at the idiocy of some people and accept that you can do nothing about it but just that. You learn that the best friends you have right now may not be the most pious or the richest or the ones with the most friends on Facebook, but because they’ve stuck with you through some significant thick and thins, you secretly (because you’re not the most publicly expressive friend on earth) and genuinely hope that you’ll still be friends when you’re 45 and menopausal.

You learn that joking about sexuality and sex brings you closer to some and unfortunately, makes you unfavourable to a few others (very few, though. Ha.) You learn that boys will be boys and only a select few will graduate into men.

I intended to catch some forty winks but I couldn’t resist typing this all down because sometimes the only thing that’ll accompany you are your words.

I felt twice as disoriented when I woke up this morning than when I went to bed last night. Reminds of being in school and the indifference for time. I don't want the past, I just want comforting feelings. But of course, your words must hang around me like unsettled ghosts.

Yours truly: How to understand mechanics in Physics?

Sister: Go to a workshop.

Permission to poke fun granted.

I don't know what's going to happen next, and neither do you. So if you really can't stand "my kind", just look away.

So today one of them basically screamed, at the top of his lungs, the word "lesbian" all the way from his room window. To me.

And then I wrote something that might be worth turning into a song. Talk about inspiration.

One crappy post, two crappy posts.